Waiting for the stain that never comes

and I are hoping that carpet stains, unlike bad luck, do not come in threes.

I got back from a gaming weekend in Derbyshire with , and others at lunchtime (sorry – I was one of the people trying to persuade to stay another day). , on the other hand, had spent all morning manning the picket lines as part of the industrial dispute between the universities and the AUT. Either last night or this morning, some darling little shit of a student had lobbed a pair of eggs into the kitchen, possibly through the catflap, possibly through a small window. Result: egg on the kitchen table, the radiator, a chair and in two places on the floor. Dried on quite nicely too. It’s going to be nigh-impossible for to do anything about this, though it seems possible that it might be related to some recent disciplinary action she had to take.

So, after a quiet afternoon in this house (“* * *”), we were just about to go out to the shops to pick up the remaining ingredients for pancakes (making pancakes for the RTs is a social activity, and not something which would involve us crossing a picket line). The cat was somewhere downstairs and scampered out of the house (as usual) as we came downstairs to the study (one level above the kitchen). When we got to the kitchen, the reason was clear. She’d caught another small rabbit (making the current score Westwood Rabbits: 0 Parkin Cats: 3 1/2), dragged it through the catflap and was beginning to eat it. Small rabbit was minus part of its face, had a detachable ear and front paw, and had contributed to the carpet stain situation with a couple of good bloodstains – right in the middle of the carpet, naturally.

Small rabbit is now in the dustbins. I’m hoping that a hapless student doesn’t come across it while trying to find space for their rubbish (the bins are very full), although the thought of hunting down the egg culprit, breaking into their room while they sleep and leaving a dismembered rabbit in their bed is strangely appealing. “You disrespect my family…

(this sounds like a letter to a women’s magazine’s household hints column: “Dear Bertha, how do I remove blood and egg stains from my carpets…”)

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